C’mon and contribute!

You know you’re from Iowa when…

• Your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March.
• You learn your pickup will run without a muffler
• You’ll skip your cousin’s funeral for the first day of deer season.
• You can eat an ear of corn with no utensils in under 20 seconds.
• You can tell the smell of a skunk and the smell of a feed lot apart.
• You think people are idiots who say: “You grow great potatoes there.”
• You consider being called a “Pork Queen” an honor
• You want to buy manure.
• You are walking knee-deep in snow.
• Your “letter jacket” was worn after your 19th birthday.
• Your Christmas gift, when you were ten years old was a shotgun (a BB gun if you were a ‘townie’).
• You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
• “Vacation” means driving through the Amanas, going to Adventureland or Okoboji.
• You have boiled fish in lye for Christmas
• The nearest mall is at least 90 minutes away
• You’ve licked frozen metal
• You have gone Trick-or-Treating in two feet of snow
• You have no concept of public transportation
• You measure distance in minutes
• Snow tires came standard on your car
• If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Iowa.
• Detassling was your first job.
• “Hick” is a style of clothing.
• There’s a tornado warning and the whole town is outside watching for it.
• The only reason you go to Wisconsin, South Dakota or Missouri is to get fireworks.
• You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
• You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings).
• Directions are given using “the” stoplight as a reference.
• You carry jumper cables in your car…and your wife/girlfriend knows how to use them.
• Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
• You are from a town that has nearly as many churches and bars as houses.
• You drink “pop”, do the “warsh”, fish in the “crick” and shingle the “ruff”
• Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big as the bun and accompanied only by mustard and pickles
• If your dad’s suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Iowa.
• You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching.
• Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.
• The local gas station sells live bait.
• Little smokies are something you serve on special occasions.
• You go to the State Fair for your family vacation.
• The meaning of true love is that you’ll ride in the tractor with him.

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