Short on money? Don’t keep your kids in the dark

By Meredith Hines-Dochterman
The Gazette

Talk to your kids about money and the economy/Stock photo by JupiterImages

The economy. Everyone is talking about it. At work. In the grocery store. At home.

Sort of.

Parents tend to avoid issues that could upset their offspring. Money is regarded as one of those “for adults only” topics, leaving kids in the dark as their parents wrestle to make ends meet. What parents don’t understand is they might be doing more harm than good.

“When parents worry, their kids worry,” said Amy Jackson, team leader for children’s services at the Abbe Center for Community Health in Cedar Rapids. “Children do listen to what adults say about the topic.”

For that reason, experts say it’s best to include children in discussions about money.

“It’s always smart to be honest with children — in accordance to their age,” said Kathleen Staley, assistant director/director of program and consultation services with the University of Iowa Counseling Service.

This doesn’t mean providing a blow-by-blow of bills and tax statements, but explaining to children that times are tough and, until times get better, there will be some changes.

“What experts suggest is one minute per grade level to explain it to them,” Jackson said.

Kathi Moss, financial wellness coordinator for Horizons, suggests families track spending, prioritize goals and make cuts where necessary. This process should include children. “It’s the only way they’ll buy into it,” Moss said.

It’s typical for young children to think money grows on trees or in ATMs. If they don’t understand why Mom and Dad can’t afford the Friday night tradition of pizza and a movie, they’ll continue to ask for it.

“Explain that there isn’t a lot of money for the extras,” Moss said. “At the same time, make sure not every extra gets cut, because then no one is happy.”

Still, talking and planning won’t make everything better. Some children will worry. They’ll require more reassurance from their parents that they’ll be OK. They’ll want to do something to help. They’ll want to talk more about the situation. All reactions are normal.

“Talk to your children as much as they need,” Staley said. “Make them part of the family unit that will come together and face tough times together.”

Jackson said if parents focus on the positives — they have a home, they have food — their kids will, too. If a child can’t stop worrying, contact their doctor or mental health professional.

“Adults need to make sure they build up their own support system,” Jackson said. “We focus on kids all the time, but adults need to have people they can lean on, too.”

Free fun

Ready to upgrade family entertainment options without breaking the bank? Here are a few money-saving ideas to get you started:

• Your local library is a one-stop shop for all kinds of entertainment, including books, movies and music. Keep an eye out on upcoming activities, including story times, movie events and special activities.
• Make game night a regular event. Choose a board game, pop some popcorn and enjoy time as a family. Trade games with friends, or set up a multifamily game night, to increase the fun.
• Explore the great outdoors. Call your local parks and recreation department for information about hiking and bike trails in the area.
• Visit the Iowa Cultural Corridor Alliance at http://www.culturalcorridor.org/for more free culture events in the area. 

© Gazette Communications 2009